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Showing posts with label San Francisco. Show all posts
Showing posts with label San Francisco. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

SAN FRANCISCO: Anti-Circumcision Group To Place Ban On City Ballot

A San Francisco anti-circumcision group has collected enough petition signatures to place a city-wide ban on the practice on the November ballot.
Legal experts, however, said even if such a measure were to pass, it would likely be quickly overturned as an unconstitutional attack on the grounds of religious freedom. Chief opponent Lloyd Schofield, 59, acknowledged circumcision is a ritual among Jews and a common practice among Muslims, but insisted it should be outlawed. "It's excruciatingly painful and permanently damaging surgery that's forced on men when they're at their weakest and most vulnerable," he said. San Francisco officials say Schofield's group submitted about 12,000 signatures supporting his proposed ban, which is more than enough to get it on the ballot in November.
The proposed measure would make it a crime to circumcise a boy under the age of 18.

Saturday, April 23, 2011

A Tale Of Two Cities

From the San Francisco Gay Men's Chorus.

(Tipped by JMG reader Sean Chapin)

Friday, April 22, 2011

The Sisters Fire Back At Porno Pete

San Francisco's Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence have fired back at hate activist Porno Pete LaBarbera, who yesterday circulated a press release denouncing the Sisters' annual "Hunky Jesus" contest. An excerpt:
First of all the Sisters would like to thank Peter La Barbaria for all the free publicity he is providing for our Hunky Jesus Contest. Even in the most reactionary communities and families there are brilliant young queer children aching for something truly revolutionary, a chance to be utterly glamorous, and to royally piss off their uptight, puritanical parents. The Sisters often declare their love for Peter and especially appreciate Mr. LaBabar's effectiveness in getting news and images of the Sisters to those children. Of course we don't hate anybody, but his saying we do is a great way to grab the interest of angry resentful children, and we have much experience in helping GLBT youngsters work through their anger to find a more joyous spiritual path.

However, as much as Mr. La Barbarella is promoting our appeal to rebellious youth, it is not really our intention or purpose to offend Christians. Many of our friends and fans are Christians as are some of the Sisters. It's not even our intention or purpose to offend uptight, humorless prigs, though we often do so by suggesting that the Deity has a sense of humor. After all, God created a garden of paradise for us, declared His/Her love for us, and created such laughably bizarre creatures as the platypus, the naked mole rat, and Sarah Palin. But our mission is not to offend. Rather we are dedicated to the expiation of stigmatic guilt and the promulgation of universal joy. Still, we do understand that any sort of liberating theology is offensive to those who want to keep others under their thumbs. Offending prudes and tyrants is not our purpose, but we consider it a bit of a bonus.
Read the Sisters' full message.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

BART Blue Sky Festival...San Francisco celebrates smog-free skies! Vendors push environment! Free BART tix!







The promotional publicity still for Bart's "Blue Sky Festival" which kicked-off today in downtown San Francisco  on the waterfront  was straightforward and to the point.

The shot featured a relatively smog-free pristine blue sky with a few lazy fluffy clouds gently billowing here and there on the horizon.

The message was crystal clear!

Thanks to BART'S visionary efforts to enlighten motorists about alternatives to fossil fuels - the picturesque city by the bay is boasting that ridership is up on environmentally-safe public transport - and that fumes that once plagued the skyline are dissipating somewhat.

To celebrate, BART tossed an upbeat soiree that environmentally-conscious folks - and businesses - responded to in droves!

In essence, the "Blue Sky Festival" is centerpiece for the exchange of great environmental info, that runs in tandem with Earth Day which rolls around every spring.

Tourists, residents out giving their dogs a stretch, and city workers on lunch break, strolled through the plaza and munched on organically-grown strawberries, nutritious health drinks, and tasty energy-raising snacks as they mulled over environmentally safe products, and energy sources.

And, thanks to a popular local band - the Venusians - did so with a bounce in their step.

Their sound - consisting mainly of percussion, synthesizers, and strings - was somewhat reminiscent of the Penguin Cafe Orchestra (featured on YouTube) according to one observer with a keen ear.

Two Polar Bears danced around the stage to joyously celebrate a turn-around in their community.

Uh-huh!

Thanks to a new wave of environmental consciousness family members are being saved from extinction!

BART also offered up a nifty reward to curiosity-seekers who made a concerted effort to pop by and check out the booths.

Every attendee who presented a "passport" with six stamps on it (provided by the vendors present) was gifted with a free $6.00 BART pass!

But, a big buzz broke out in the crowd, when the opportunity to win a snazzy "fold up" bike presented itself.

Handy, when 'ya consider, that is the only two-wheeler that Officials on the Public Transportation system allow.

Other "green" friendly businesses participating included Bike Link / eLock, Breathe California & Greenbelt Alliance, City Car Share & ZipCar, Rock ' n Socks & Rickshaw Bagworks, Jamba Juice and Premier Organics.

If 'ya missed it, catch the Blue Sky Festival next year!

Or, at least, check out EarthShareCA.org for more details.








Quote Of The Day - Peter LaBarbera

"This Easter Sunday in San Francisco's Delores Park, Christianity-spoofing homosexual drag queen 'nuns' calling themselves the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence will stage their annual 'Hunky Jesus' contest -- mocking the Savior of the world, Jesus Christ -- as shirtless men in 'crucifixion' costumes parade on stage in an atmosphere of haughty, homoerotic humor.

"There's nothing that delights arrogant, pro-homosexual liberals more than making fun of Bible-believing Christians -- as evidenced by this blasphemous Easter contest. Of course, it goes without saying that these defiant champions of 'tolerance and diversity' wouldn't dare hold a 'Hunky Muhammad' contest during Ramadan -- so it seems even envelope-pushing, in-your-face, pro-perversion libertines know their limits." - Porno Pete LaBarbera, in a press release distributed today by Christian Newswire and republished on Free Republic.

Barack Obama...Protesters stalk President in San Francisco! Medical Marijuana demands!

 




One protester waved a placard with a cartoon-like image of Uncle Sam with "Liar" crudely scrawled on its face, the San Francisco Police Department scrambled to put up barriers between a mob that had gathered and a Presidential motorcade, and a Government helicopter circled overhead signalling that Barack Obama was on his way.

As protestors chanted slogans ("Safe Acess Now" & "DEA Go Away! ") frenzied newsmen from the major Networks jockeyed for position at the curb in a bold-faced effort to capture the rally as it unfolded on the street about fifty feet away from the entrance of the St. Regis Hotel where the President was expected any minute.

Motorists honked their horns in support as the rag-tag gang of citizens shouted out their slogans and angrily denounced President Obama for failing to honor a promise.

Shortly after Obama took office, he promised to end the persistent DEA para-military-style raids on pot dispensaries in California.

Readers at forgus beylan may recall I posted a feature on the issue shortly after I received a press release from the White House.

Post: 10/19/10

http://forgusbeylan.blogspot.com/2009/10/medical-marijuanafederal-government.html

However, for some inexplicable reason, the President failed to follow through on his promise.

In spite of the fact the "Compassionate use of Medical Marijuana" was voted into law a few years ago, the DEA has continued to raid California pot dispensaries, at whim.

I previously attended protests at DEA headquarters and reported on the issues.

Post:  12/02/2010

http://forgusbeylan.blogspot.com/2010/02/marijuana-ballot-measure-to-legalize.html

Today, the President was undoubtedly aware of the greeting that awaited him at the St. Regis, judging by the show of force at the entrance of the Hotel, in the streets outside, and all-around a full city block.

In fact, when first strolled down the 3rd Street before the protest was underway, I stumbled on a couple of undercover cops whispering into walkie-talkies.

In one funny moment, a meter maid sped up to a parked car to issue a ticket - at which point - a gentleman darted out and informed her it was his vehicle and that he was with the Secret Service!
When the motorcade arrived, it was replete with a San Francisco Police Depatment escort, consisting of at least ten armed officers on motorcyles (with sirens sounding and lights flashing) and at least a dozen-or-so high-security vehicles (including a bomb squad!).

One reporter quizzed one of the protesters in jest.

"Do you think the President knows that you're here?  Do you think he cares?"

The spirited activist responded in the negative naturally.

It would have been a beautiful moment for the President - if he had only stopped by at the curb - and uttered up a few assurances.

Or, would the political mumble-jumble have amounted to more hollow promises? 

The same old same old!

For the protesters, it was a challenging day, to say the least.

A fierce wind blew down Market Street and icy temperatures chilled to the bone.

The Medical Marijuana activists drifted into a pre-arranged location at 3rd & Market Streets - where they worked out the details of their game plan - so the rally would be more impacting when it went down.

I thought it ironic that the starting point for the protest was in front of the  the AT & T building.

After all, the dedicated ativists wanted to reach out and touch at least one special person!

Needless to say, the brave upstarts got the cold shoulder from the President, and were kept at arm's length.

At one point, security spied a blue knapsack that appeared to be left unattended on the street.

Before pouncing on the mysterious bag, officers went through the crowds to determine if it belonged to any of the protesters, or a member of the press.

A few minutes later - when they were unable to determine who it belonged to - one officer (who had been quite respectful maintaining control of the protesters earlier) rifled through it to determine its contents.

The San Francisco Police Department should be commended for doing an exemplary job.

When I started towards an area where the protesters were forming, one officer quizzed me about my intentions, before letting me pass.

I pointed out that I was there to cover the protest, at which point, he noted that arrangements had been made to coral the activists at one location where they would be able to exercise their right to free speech.

Meanwhile, the blockade all around the hotel was causing a few headaches for commuters heading off to work.

Unfortunately, many were forced to detour around the Hotel to reach their destinations.

When they arrived late at the office, would their bosses believe their flimsy excuses?

A few tourists were literally confused!

But, all in all, it was a peaceful rally with good spirits all around.

Too bad the star of the event was a "no show" - in the street with the voting public - at least.

How will this impact his image - and his ratings in the polls - I wonder.

News at 11!

http://www.thetattler.biz/


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Garage Door Magic

The owners of a Haight district apartment building found a clever way to maintain their building's Victorian facade when adding a garage.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Barack Obama...Medical Marijuana protesters to confront President tomorrow! St. Regis! San Francisco!






 








When President Obama slips out of a limo purring curbside to attend a "Breakfast with the President" soiree bright-and-early tomorrow in downtown San Francisco there will be a rag-tag gang of protesters from Americans For Safe Access (ASA) on hand to demand that the President fulfill a promise to guarantee all "Patient Rights" in respect to the compassionate use of Medical Marijuana.

In spite of Obama's insistence - that the DEA Military-style raids on pot dispensaries would cease - they have persisted in recent days!

Tattler readers may recall that I attended and reported on street protests in the past:

Post:  02/08/2010

http://forgusbeylan.blogspot.com/2010/02/marijuana-ballot-measure-to-legalize.html

At this point, the mantra should be:

We're mad as hell, and we're not going to take it anymore!

"It's time we held the President accountable for his broken promise," a spokesperson informed me earlier this afternoon in a hasty press notice that was fired off by e-mail from ASA Headquarters.

The vocal activists are going to turn-out tomorrow - in full force - in front of the St. Regis Hotel.

"This is the time to pull our community together, express our displeasure with Obama's lack of regard for our community, and demand that he live up to his promises."

RALLY FOR PATIENT RIGHTS

St. Regist Hotel
125 3rd Street
San Francisco, CA

TIME

7:30 a.m.

FLYERS

Supporters attening the rally are instructed to print and distribute fliers which may be downloaded from the Americans for Safe Access web site.

http://safeacceesnow.org

SAMPLE FLYERS

"We are Sick and Tired!"

"Protect Cannabis Patients' Rights!"

"Reschedule Cannabis Now!"

"Federal Protection Not Federal Prosecution!"

CARPOOLS

Protestors may contact ASA to arrange for car pools so that interested parties without transportation may attend the event in downtown San Francisco.

 action@safeaccessnow.org.

http://www.thetattler.biz


Laura Linney...perfect for role of Socialite! Scandals of Privileged Few!








Last week I raved about the production of "Upstairs Downstairs" which was broadcast on PBS on Masterpiece Classics.

One of my favorite actresses - Laura Linney (Tales of the City) - took on the role of gracious host and introduced the much-ballyhooed high-brow potboiler.

As Ms. Linney was offering up a brief synopsis of the well-crafted mini-series (adapted from a Jane Austin novel) it suddenly hit me like a thunderbolt.

The charismatic beauty was the perfect actress to play the juicy role of - Candace Whitney - one of the main characters in my first novel -"Scandals of the Privileged Few - which I am currently serializing on forgus beylan each week.

OMG!

If I ever get funding - and an offer to produce the project - Ms. Linney has first dibs!

News at 11!

http://www.thetattler.biz/




Upstairs Downstairs

Curtis Stone...Celebrity Chef hosts Penfolds Premiere Grange Dinner! San Francisco!








That - oh! so sexy! - top celebrity Chef "Curtis Stone" (TV personality extraordinaire!) - jets into the bay area next week to host a chi chi Vintage Wine tasting event and dinner.

The spikey-haired blond hottie - with the puppy-dog eyes and captivating measured speech - doesn't come on the cheap!

The glittering soiree - being pushed by his slick handlers as an ultra-tony "Premiere Grange Dinner" (sponsored by Penfolds Vintage Wine Cellars) - is selling out fast at $350 a pop!

The elite few who attend will have a delicous opportunity to sample a dazzling array of sought-after wines, such as Penfolds Grange Shiraz (2006), Penfolds St. Henri Shiraz (2007), Penfolds Bin 707 Cabernet Sauvignon (2008), Penfolds RWT Barossa Valley Shiraz (2008), and Penfolds Yattarna Chardonnay (2008).

The much-ballyood celebrity-studded event is slated to kick off on April 30th at 7 p.m.

The following day, on May 1st, a wine-tasting ceremony will follow-up at a humbler more-affordabe rate of $75.00 with Winemaking Ambassador Matt Lane at the helm.

Reservations and Information

Lily.Lane@penfolds.com

707.299.3252




Latino and Asian voters...cry foul! At-large elections not fair!







Years ago, when Harvey Milk first ran for office in the Castro District, he lost the first couple of times out at the polling stations.

That is a little known footnote in San Francisco (and LGBT) history.

The reason he failed to nab the popular vote first-time out in the heady days of open-and-out gay activism?

Quite simply, the city districts were structured in such a way, that the election process did not favor the homosexual community.

However, once the Castro District was rezoned, Milk was able to snap up the majority - in neighborhood where the voters were mostly gay or homo-friendly - go figure!

Now, the Asian and Latino communities in San Mateo County are crying foul for the same reason.

The two ethnic groups make up one quarter of the county's nearly 72,000 residents and a slightly smaller share of its voting-age population.

So, what is the fuss all about?

The two minorities are lamenting the fact that only one Latino - and no Asians-Americans - have held seats on the five-member Board of Supervisors since 1995.

According to a spokesperson for the disgruntled voters, the at-large system - combined with alleged "racially polarized voting" - unlawfully deprives Latino and Asian members in the community to voice their preferences meaningfully with ballot-in-hand.

For this reason, a lawsuit - based on voting rights - has been filed against San Mateo County.

The plaintiffs are demanding that the Judge presiding over the proceedings declare the upcoming county-wide elections illegal. 

Pursuant to state law, attorney Robert Rubin (Lawyers' Committee for Civil Rights) has argued that new election districts should include a majority-Latino and majority-Asian American district.

"And, perhaps there should be a third district, in which two groups together form a majority," he noted, in an after-thought.

In response, County Counsel John Beiers has stated for the record in no uncertain terms, that he has not seen any evidence that the at-large system weakens the voting power of Latinos or Asian Americans.

The underlying arguments that the suit is based on refers to a 2002 California voting-rights Law that prohibits at-large elections in areas with a history of racially polarized voting - such as in the case where the majority voted as a bloc - against minority candidates and minority interests.

The litigants are optimistic about their chances of prevailing in court.

After all, an appeals court upheld the law in a suit against Modesto, in 2006.

On the heels of the ruling, the city switched from an at-large system to district elections.

In defense, opponents argue quite vigorously that at-large elections encourage voters to consider diverse views of an entire city or county.

But, critics pooh pooh that notion, for good reason.

In their view, the at-large elections allow a majority - whether racial or political - to control a governing board and ignore minority concerns.

We'll see which way the wind blows, after the issues are hashed out in court.

http://www.thetattler.biz




Beachfront property worth fighting for!

Scandals...of the Privileged Few! A Novel by Julian Ayrs! Chapter 4!











'Lincecum was obviously shooting for his fourteenth no-hitter," Jock theorized, as he threw back a shot of whiskey and snatched up a handful of salted peanuts to munch on.

"Damn! Missed that," Colby groaned, without skipping a beat.

"I was stuck in bumper-to-bumper traffic on the Golden Gate," he fumed.

"Some asshole ran out of gas in the middle of the bridge and caused a huge traffic jam.

"Times are tough, 'ya know. A lot of folks can't afford to just filler 'er up, these days like they used to. Not at $4.50 a gallon. Five bucks, here. Ten bucks, there. Fortunately, I have a gauge on my dash that keeps an eye on the gas and mileage. Talk about a guzzler! But, at least I'm not running-on-empty."

"So, do 'ya bet on the Giants, or what," Colby quizzed with a sly grin on his face.

"Got any action 'ya can turn me on to?"

"Naw!"

Jock considered himself a bit of an amateur sports writer when it came to America's favorite pastime - and the Giants – of course.

Shortly after he caught the black and orange bug a few months ago (just before the rag-tag team was thrown together by Bochy and roared on to nab the World Championships) Jock launched a blog on the internet to keep track of each glorious hit, homer, and nasty slide.

The California transplant liked to think that he was actually fanning fan frenzy, egging the ballplayers on from the sidelines, and boosting morale.

The blog was gaining momentum - which was gratifying – because he’d tinkered with the concept quite a bit to get it up-and-running.

On occasion, Jock would glance up from his laptop – a bit weary-eyed and worse-for-wear – and be taken aback when he spied the two hands on the antique Grandfather clock in the hall spelling out some ungodly hour at the crack of dawn.

"Spare time on my free evenings is gobbled up just like that," he bluntly noted to Colby, as he snapped his fingers to accentuate the fact.

If he wasn’t careful - he’d be sucked into a vortex –  beyond this dimension inside the computer screen.

"So, 'ya getting many hits these days?"

"Uh-huh," Jock beamed, with smug satisfaction, as he double-checked the score for a hockey game on the wide-screen TV overhead running on muted mode overhead.

"The college kids want iTunes – pop chart stuff - when they're cruising the bimbos and letting off steam," the owner fessed up.

"Hitter's Paradise” had all the look and feel of a gritty New York sports bar - except for the lack of sports anchors droning in the background - in the dimly-lit watering hole.

"I installed this really cool tracking software. It's amazing, when 'ya think about it. Every day when I check the stats, I'm blown away. I have followers all the way down the coast, and North up to Alaska - even overseas in Germany and Italy - you name it!"

Once the traffic started to rev up, Jock was keen on fathoming ways to jazz up the web site, with the hope that he’d attract more dedicated fans.

By analyzing the numbers, Jock – a newbie, when it came to computers - was able to figure out which of the Giants were snapping up the most attention and why.

Yeah, it was turning out to be a popularity contest, like it or not.

Some folks may fear the beard – or think he’s downright wacky – but golly.

Wilson had quite a following, it was undeniable.

So, at the suggestion of an advertising exec he played golf with, Jock started posting action shots of Wilson, Tim Lincecum, and Buster Posey in ubiquitous hot-spots on the site.

If the featured players passed the litmus test – got a few hundred clicks or two – the images were left to grace the homepage.

Right now, Jock was trying to rustle up sponsors to generate some moolah, too.

Ultimately, he was anxious to expand and develop his sports blog and - in particular - a highlight he kiddingly referred to as the - "baseball web of fame".

"Heh, maybe I’ll tell my boss to take the job and shove it one day,” he cackled gleefully one raucous night, after he had a few mood-altering cocktails under his belt.

Lincecum was the player he admired the most.

"It’s uncanny. That arm of his is a gold mine, alright” he boasted on Tim’s behalf to his pals just prior to the start up of a match on local turf at AT & T ballpark over the weekend.

“And, sometimes - the way the sunlight falls on his face in the middle of a play - it's awesome, really."

"Sheer poetry in motion. Yup," an older gent, down-in-his-cups, uttered up from the shadows near the back door.

"Sometimes, you have to wonder – what’s he thinking under that baseball cap - once it's so tightly screwed down over his forehead."

Is he shy, or what?

"Modest, just betcha. It’s important to cut the bullshit and focus on the task at hand,” Jock added, matter-of-fact.

"The way Lincecum takes command on the pitcher's mound after they've been biting the dust. It's – well – mesmerizing!”

"Well, they don't call him the freak for no good reason, eh?" Colby teased in jest.

"Hard luck for Zito, though. What - he's out a month - that right?"

"Sprained his right foot," Jock uttered up in disgust.

"Zito dove to catch a pop in front of the mound in the 2nd inning. Risky, didn’t pay off, in the end."

"He left the clubhouse on crutches with a swollen ankle. Nothing broken, though."

"Pussy!"

Colby laughed out loud.

"It gets my goat, the way some of the ballplayers – Bumgarner, for example – lick their wounds in public.”

"Today was a huge step for me from where I've been. I started getting confidence back and to believe in myself a little more," Jock mimicked, at which point Colby cracked up, and slapped his buddy on the back in agreement.

"But, on occasion - when he reveals his sensitive feminine side - it gives me a roaring hard on.”

"The kid is too touchy-feely. He needs to beef up," the bartender quipped as he strode by in the direction of a table of lugheads with a half-a-dozen brewskies frothing at their mouths on a silver tray.

"Pump some iron, at least," Colby joked, as he unloosened his tie and rolled up his sleeves.

"Time to get down and get dirty."

It had been a tough day down at the stock exchange.

When a reporter announced on the local news that there was a shift in management at one of his top-sellers the stock took a nose dive.

"Didn't lose my shirt, though. Never have, yet!"

One of these days, he vowed he was going to get out of the racket.

Time to unwind!

“Party-time,” Colby cheered a bit shit-faced.

"One round on me, Frankie," he belted out to the bartender, as he slightly slurred his words.

"You're cut off," the struggling actor kidded, as he spun on his heel - tossed a bottle in the air - and on the rebound ceremoniously poured out a couple of shots with style and pizzazz.

"No, this one's on me, bud!"

"Fag," he barked out jokingly.

"Takes one to know one," he goosed back.

Colby chuckled.

About this time of the night, the bawdy locker room antics of the locals, usually revved up.

Ah, life was sweet.

He gulped down a tall glass of ice wate and popped a couple of aspirins.

That little cautionary act on a night of boozing usually prevented a splitting headache from rearing its ugly head the next day.

___________________________________________________


"Quite a turn-out," Candace whispered under her breath to her husband, as she maneuvered her way through Wilsey Court, in search of an obliging waiter with a tray of champagne in hand.

The one-hundred-or-so Balenciaga designer gowns on exhibit at the de Young Museum were simply exquisite.

"Anna loves the show, but with a laugh noted it was time for Hamish to get back to work," she overheard Sloan Barrett joke, as she flitted off to get a glimpse of Gwyneth Paltrow.

"Oh, she's posing for photographers with Juliet de Baubigny. You know, the hot-to-trot blond who pushes venture capital at Kleiner Perkins," one of her bridge buddies cooed with a slight dig in her voice.

The Balenciaga Gala brought out the power elite, that's for sure, one excited interior decorator gushed to his bottle-blond boyfriend in an aside.

Anna Wintour, the Editor for Vogue, was holding court in one corner.

In another alcove, Maria Bello and Mia Wasikowska – two talented actresses out-on-the-town – chatted each other up oblivious to the showy goings-on raging on all around them with gay abandon.

Mayer (Google) and Sheryl Sandberg (Facebook) – both dressed-to-the-nines in sparkly pricey frocks – talked tech shop.

Go figure!

A tastefully decorated tented patio was the place to schmooze - if a guest was capable of finagling his or her way inside the canvas gate – and likewise - manage to locate a plum perch.

Stanlee Gatti’s dazzling purple banquettes - festively adorned with eye-catching floral centerpieces topped with ornate black branches and sprigs of orange rinds - were a hit with the chic set in attendance.

"Did you get his card, dear," one socialite decked out in heavy artillery - a dazzling array of precious and semi-precious gems draped around her thin elegant neck - pestered her escort.

Former Mayor, Gavin Newsom, was seen glad-handing supporters as he flirted with a pretty lady or two.

His wife didn’t appear to be miffed at the glaring slight.

Was that really Orlando Bloom looking nonchalant and sporting a designer tux?

“He’s more of a stud in the flesh,” Candace mused to herself.

On screen, he came off a little bit too pretty - effeminate, in fact - Candace giggled to a handsome lawyer who was a Senior partner at the Meagan, Flom, and Del Toux.

After gently nursing a couple of glasses of bubbly down, Candace felt a little tipsy.

The pretty ball gowns adorning the svelte frames of the tony elite tonight signaled that black was the hue and cry of the fashionistas this season.

Pastels occasionally made a splashy entrance – and thus - managed to brighten up the sumptuous but staid - environs a smidgen.

Individual style – buoyed up with subtle romantic flourishes - was still in vogue.

“Timeless in appeal,” one up-and-coming dress designer sniffed in an arrogant snotty tone of voice.

Candace’s ankles were killing her.

She was tempted to slip the heels right off her feet, and stroll barefoot on the cool expensive marble floor, but decided against it.

It was silly to have tossed the pricey designer footwear on in view of the fact the Museum was packed to capacity.

For starters, some slightly inebriated fool might step on her toes, or - at a minimum - spill an exotic cocktail all over her spanking-new shoes.

On the other hand, the soiree was so packed, that it was doubtful anyone would be able to catch sight of her dainty beautifully-crafted high heels below the hectic fray.

Besides, as they say in Hollywood - if they're looking at your feet - you're in trouble.

For 39, she was still a looker, thanks to the skillful handiwork of a precise plastic surgeon in Beverly Hills.

No nips and tucks, not for Candace!

Who wants to end up with a ghastly stretched face mirroring that of Joan Rivers?

Dr. Logan diligently extracted a bit of fat drooping at the eyelid, for starters.

Then, expertly dealt with the crow’s feet.

Injections – fillers, as they’re referred to – triggered a magical transformation.

Within minutes, her skin was as smooth and as wrinkle-free as a baby’s virgin bottom.

In her youth, the seductive bombshell often engaged in a daily ritual, which just about ruined her skin permanently.

Every day around noon, she’s slip out to the pool – don a skimpy bikini – then slather on thick baby oil mixed with iodine.

For the next hour or two, the New Yorker would bake in the sizzling hot sun, unaware of the devastating damage she was causing.

Today, Candace recoils in horror at the mere thought of punishing her skin in that senseless fashion.

The former top model wised up.

What was the worst time of day to saunter out for some rays?

At peak hours – when the sun beat down in all its intensity – between 11 o’clock in the morning and 3 o’clock in the afternoon.

Just twenty minutes in direct sunlight can cause irreversible permanent damage.

Yes, slapping on skin block and moisturizers was of the utmost importance to ensure radiant healthy skin prevailed.

But, it was also essential to remain hydrated, and likewise, feast on delicious fresh fruit and raw vegetables rich in vitamins and nutrients.

In addition to a nourishing diet, a full night’s rest was key, too.

“Oh, Ms. Whitney is so high maintenance,” her nanny used to giggle to all within earshot.

Uh-huh.

You get the face you deserve at 50!

She always had this strange idea that a person’s thoughts, their feelings – even their attitude about life – influenced the process of exterior aging (and ultimately shaped first expressions and the overall attitude of a face).

Hard rockers like Mick Jagger and Keith Richards were not only perfect examples of what happens with skin care negligence  - but illustrated the horrors of what happens when an indiviudal pursues a wild party lifestyle with a vengeance.

At least her husband didn't stray - and hot-blooded males still made a play for her – alright.

Why not?

She wasn’t a cougar by any stretch of the imagination.

On the contrary, Candace was elegant, and stylish, and carried herself well.

"Oh, Candace, there you are!"

She turned, as Armistead Maupin came into view.

"There’s someone I want you to meet,” he gushed.

After he gave a little bow, a broad smile swept across his face.

Classy man.

Not a bad writer, either.

It wasn’t always wise to open up too much to Maupin, though.

Without intending to – and certainly not with any malicious forethought – friends and acquaintances (the shells of them at least?) often turned up between the hard-bound covers of his bestsellers.

Go figure!

On occasion, the guessing game became party fodder, alright.

Candace needed to lighten up, relax, and savor life more.

Some days, it was difficult to let her guard down, though.

A wall - a mask she hid behind - separated her from the rest of the world.

Unknown to many, she’d suffered through the school of hard knocks, though.

Who knew?

She raised herself up – when no one else would lend a hand – which was good on her.

Uh-huh.

A deep dark secret lurked beneath the surface, and sometimes gnawed away at her very soul, though no one else was aware of it.

Consequently, hooking up with her husband was a Godsend, in many respects.

While he waas out of town - usually on business - Candace was often left to her own devices.

Indeed, she was left to indulge in her new-found independence - and most importantly - pursue her interests in the Ballet, Modern Art,  and flower arrangement.

Orchids were her favorite.

The name - Orchid - came from the Greek "órkhis" which literally means "testicle" because of the shape of the root.

In most cultures, the exotic flower has been seen a symbol of beauty, royalty or love.

In Europe, orchids were used as a main ingredient in love potions.

Ancient Greeks also associated orchids with virility and fertility.

It was believed that if the father of an unborn child ate the largest and newest orchid stems and roots, then their child would be a male. But if the mother ate small orchid roots and stems, then she would give birth to a girl.

Today, the pink orchid is commonly designated as the 14th wedding anniversary flower, symbolizing affection and love.

That reminded her, they'd be celebrating their 13th, next week.

Maybe they should take a relaxing cruise to Hawaii?

(to be continued)

http://www.thetattler.biz/




SF Giants Brian Wilson & Cody Ross Get Silly With YouTube Star Keenan Cahill

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Barack Obama...jets into San Francisco! Horns of dilemma!















Once again, President Obama is jetting into the picturesque bay area to lock "horns" with the captains of Industry on the West Coast.

Actually, on the heels of a controversy over the President's reluctance to engage in a little show-and-tell by coughing up his elusive long-form birth certificate - stirred up by irascible White House hopeful Donald Trump - Obama has reiterated once again for the record that he doesn't have any horns!

"And, I became a man in Chicago," he quipped at the podium last week on the heels of the "birthing" issue which was recently resurrected - ironically - during the sacred Easter holiday season.

However, Governor Brewer nixed all that when she got cold feet and vetoed a bill to force the President's claw - er - hand.

Did Brewer back down for political reasons (with an eye to the future) or because she just doesn't have the balls anymore to fight with the big boys on the hill in Washington?

Meanwhile, the President will rub elbows with enterprising Facebook owner - Mark Zuckerberg  - and other technology leaders shortly after he touches down on the tarmac.

The spirited talks - mostly behind-closed-doors - are expected to put the spotlight on Government investments in research and development, education, and clean energy," according to Barack's handlers.

The president is slated to arrive Thursday evening, then fly out of San Francisco International Airport on Friday morning, on a precise no-nonesense time-table.

Will Barack dawdle a moment-or-two at SFO to take a gander at dazzling spanking-new Terminal 2, which was recently transformed into a jet-setter's hop-over paradise?

By the way, the President has invited fascinated voters to get involved virtually - on the Internet this intriguing time-around.

Barack is now utilizing the potent power of the world-wide-web (and its ubiquitous presence) to rustle up - a younger, hipper, more technologically-advanced demographic - which will undoubtedly help him land the election in 2012.

While the White House insists that the President is only trying to reach out to Americans who would not generally turn to traditional media sources for information, Facebook has been exploiting the situation in a sly bold-faced effort to play a major role in President Obama's political campaign next year.

It's good for business, after all.

The heck with the country, eh?

Do you suppose the hornless one owns stock in the popular social hub?

Only the Winklevoss twins - and Mark Zuckerberg - know for sure.

News at 11!

http://www.thetattler.biz




Big Brother gets technologically with-it!

Monday, April 18, 2011

San Francisco...earthquake! City rocks & rolls @ 3 pm! Big one on way!










OMG!

How does that hit tune go?

"I felt the earth move under my feet!"

Uh-huh!

I was standing at a computer terminal at the Main Library in downtown San Francisco a few minutes ago - checking out source material - when the floor suddenly rippled, the walls turned liquid, and my heart fluttered nervously for a second or two.

Earthquake!

Mind you, it was just a gentle rocking one, but nothing to sniff at!

Ironically - local News anchors were just chatting each other up about the possiblity of a quake today - of all days!

Apparently, yesterday was the anniversay of the legendary quake that shook the city to its foundations - causing it to erupt in fire and burn to the ground many moons ago - around the turn-of-the century.

In fact, a rag-tag gang of historians trotted down to Market Street last night - to solemnly draw attention to that fateful day when San Franciscans were forced to rebuild from scratch after the devasting temblor struck.

Lotta's Fountain, where the vigil took place, was the only public memorial left standing way back when!

Scientists were predicting a fifty-to-sixty percent chance that the earth would rumble today.

Golly!

When I first immigrated to the U.S. - and took up residence in Southern California - the tiniest rolling motion usually jolted me from a deep sleep.

Over time, I became accustomed to the nudges, and paid them no mind over time.

Until the Northridge Earthquake hit, that is.

Unfortunately, I was renting an apartment in a five-story New York-style walk-up, which the landlord neglected to retrofit.

In the middle of the night, I was shaken from a deep slumber, and confronted with a lot of moaning-and-groaning as the foundations began to shift and collapse beneath me.

What the!

Outside, I suddenly caught sight of all the city lights across Los Angeles, suddenly being extinguished in waves from one end of town to the next as the power flashed out.

Suddenly, I was in a panic, because the creaking began to increase in volume signalling an impending disaster to come.

I scrambled out of bed and was faced with a couple of dilemmas.

For starters, all the power was out, so I was unable to locate my clothes.

Uh-huh.

I sleep in the nude!

For a few tense moments, I stumbled around in the dark tripping and falling over furniture - and a host of once-nifty little collectables - that were now strewn all over the apartment floor in disarray.

Once I managed to get dressed, I faced a pressing new frightful problem.

A bookshelf in the hall had fallen in front of the door and was making my exit next-to-impossible.

When I finally escaped into the dark hall, with the building sinking below my barefeet by the minute, I was forced to dart down five flights of stairs in the eerily silent apartment house.

Where was everyone?

Was this just some horrific nightmare?

Outside, when I alighted into the dark spooky night, I spied all of my neighbors huddled in their cars fiddling with their radios.

News reports were being excitedly dispated from radio stations around the city.

Meanwhile, just down the street, there was a lot of looting underway on Hollywood Boulevard.

At least right up 'til the moment the military moved in, drew their rifles, and stood watch over the fray until a semblance of order was regained.

As I noted in my post later, I felt like I was in war-torn Beirut, God forbid!

Post: 04/19/2008

http://forgusbeylan.blogspot.com/2008/04/northridge-earthquakea-lesson-to-all.html

A few hours later, the City Inspector entered the premises, and issued red-tag warnings to the tenants.
Because of the precarious condition of the old brick building, we were barred from returning to our homes!

As I noted in updates in the past, earthquakes are not entirely out-of-the-norm on the San Andreas fault.

If you scrutinize a map, it becomes painstakingly evident - that because Los Angeles, San Francisco, and Seattle rest on two plates (that are moving in different directions beneath the shakey earth) - quakes are inevitable.

In fact, I am predicting another "big one" in the next five years!

Today, was just a percursor to a series of quakes, that are going to do down starting this week.

So, hold onto your britches  and secure all those expensive china plates on display in the dining-room, because we're all in for a bumpy night or two.

Just betcha, die-hard Californians will stay, and brave the inevitable.

I'm certainly not packing!

http://www.thetattler.biz



Scandals of the Privileged Few! A Novel by Julian Ayrs! Chapter 3!










Robert tossed the newspaper down on the antique oak desk and reflected on the Court's ruling for a moment before jotting down a few salient points he'd argue at his lecture the week next at Harvard.

Justice Roberts got it right.

The outcome rested on constitutional law - even still - the end scenario stank.

It irked Steele that a posse of hateful Christians got a nod from the highest court in the land.

And, the plaintiffs were left to skulk away and lick their wounds.

"Well, it proves that the system works," quipped a senior partner at a lunch earlier that eventful day.

"But, justice wasn't served," a snotty waiter flippantly snipped as he scurried off to take an order at the next table.

Yeah, picketing a funeral - on any grounds - was a pretty despicable act.

Even Roberts - a well-meaning turd - admitted as much as that if you read between the lines.

In the final analysis?

The Supreme Court was forced to recognize that the protesters (headed up by a born-again Christian with all the intelligence of a slug) had a Constitutional right to voice their opinion pursuant to the U.S. Constitution.

In the eyes of decent folks, the Church group’s anti-gay protests at funerals (where picket signs were crudely scrawled with slogans like "God Hates fags" and "Thank God for dead Soldiers”) were sick and in bad taste.

Although their message may have been lacking in any resemblance to the loving God portrayed in the scriptures – or the Lord's message of compassion and understanding and forgiveness – the Supreme Court noted that the bible thumpers observed the laws of the land because they maintained a thousand-foot buffer zone and protested without “physical” violence .

What about the mental and emotional anguish they wrought on innocent mourners, Steele wondered aloud to himself, in total disbelief.

But, there it was, in black and white.

"Even hurtful speech on public issues merits 1st Amendment protection" the Court found (8 in favor and 1 in dissent).

Robert was just putting the finishing touches on his prepared speech when the joyous bells at quaint old St. Mary's chimed!

He glanced at the diamond-encrusted face of his tank watch.

Midnight!

The hours had slipped away into the dead of night without Robert being any-the-wiser.

It was time to pack up his briefcase and head home for a nightcap before tucking in for the night.

Suddenly, it hit him like a ton of bricks.

Tomorrow was Palm Sunday.

It was a toss up.

Should he attend a service at Grace Cathedral - which was obviously going to "play" to a packed house - with a lot of high drama and pomp and circumstance?

Maybe, he should just slip into the oldest Cathedral in the San Francisco - St. Mary’s – instead.

Coincidentally, just a few days ago, Robert received an e-mail from the Church leaders at Grace announcing the launch of their spanking-new web site.

How long would it be before church-goers elected to sleep in Sunday in favor of attending a "virtual" service later in the day when the lingering cobwebs of the all-knowing subsconscious finally surrendered their subjects to the warmth of a lazy sunny day?

Just click on a link - and presto - divulge the innermost secrets of the soul.

Confession!

“Do you suppose those wise old priests are scheming to utilize PayPal to rake in oodles of cash securely online," he joked to his neighbor over the fence as he dashed out to toss the trash in a ubiquitous recycle bin.

"A lot classier than passing around the hat," his neighbor shot back cynically.

Well, that would solve the problem of the snatch-and-grabs (theft) that were proliferating at collection boxes in the dank dark shadows of the grand old Cathedral.

"Until some scam artist from Nigeria hacks the site," Steele chuckled to himself.

Whew, he was tired, and needed a break.

At this juncture, he stretched his arms out high above his head – rolled his back a fraction to get the tension out - then hit the log-off button on his IBM ThinkPad.

Thank God, his Toshiba laptop was stolen.

After all, that unexpected turn-of-events ended up being a blessing in disguise.

But, the mugging was disturbing, nonetheless.

For years, Robert felt totally secure (and safe) residing on the West Coast in the tony climbs of sophisticated San Francisco.

Then, one night after a chat with friends over coffee at Serendipity - out-of-the-blue - three thugs dashed up from behind him on the dimly-lit street and snatched his laptop right out of his fine-boned hands.

"Heh," he cried out in shock, as they dashed down the street at breakneck speed.

At this point, Robert literally froze on the spot, as he watched the thieving trio disappear down a side street and into a dark alley.

For a moment, he was tempted to give them a merry chase.

But, he had second thoughts, after an inner voice cautioned against it.

Just maybe, the toughs were trying to lure him into an out-of-the-way spot, so they could steal his wallet and relieve him of his diamond ring and gold crucifix?

Oh well, good riddance!

Up until that point, Steele had been experiencing quite a few headaches, because of a handful of nasty glitches which were driving him over the edge.

In fact, the busy lawyer found himself spending more time editing his copy - than drafting his legal papers - that's how bad the word processing end got.

Shabby poorly-designed software was the culprit.

For example, the cursor on the Best Buy El Cheapo special, often hopped around the screen at whim.

Damn annoying!

In high school, he distinctly recalled that his teacher always hammered into him the importance of not looking at the copy or the keys when transcribing material from from one location to another.

"If you look back and forth, you'll develop a bad habit. And, you'll never learn to type properly, only hen and pick," Miss Fraser instructed daily from her podium at the front of the cramped school room at Humberside High.

Looking back, he recalled that he had a bit of a crush on the pretty young blond with the dazzling come-hither look.

Unfortunately, one day one of the bullies in class was inclined to embarrass the heck out of her, just to be mean.

He was a total asshole,

For example, during the second semester the rumor-mill started to spread a nasty piece of gossip.

Miss Fraser got knocked up!

Uh-huh!

To make matters worse, the joker hatched up an idea to put her on the hot seat, go figure!

"By the way,” he started off slowly at the end of class.

“Is it Miss or Missus,” he blurted out with a smirk on his acne-ridden face.

The silence in the aftermath was so loud, and awkward, it was deafening.

Without skipping a beat, Ms. Fraser reacted, just as her face turned beet red.

"Miss."

The insensitive bastard let out a guffaw, then recoiled in horror, as the rest of the class angrily stared him down.

After all, Ms. Fraser was one of the school’s favorite teachers, who was well-liked.

How cruel.

Shortly after that, in the last phase of her pregnancy, Ms. Fraser departed from the school without saying good-bye.

Yup.

One rainy day, some grey-haired old spinster gruffly strode in the room, and ordered us to turn to page fifty-six for the next lesson without so much as a “how are you, kids?"

Typing class was never the same after that.

But, in retrospect, the snappy dresser was glad he took typing - instead of the other option (Latin).

"That was before the advent of computer laptops. Who knew how important it would be to type proficiently? To most of the guys, it was the pussy's way out, to rustle up a decent credit to get by in High School," Robert recalled jokingly to one of his work-out buddies.

I wonder what ever happened to Ms. Fraser, he wondered to himself years later.

______________________________________________________


The hike up the steep hill to Grace Cathedral was an arduous one.

But, it was that, or circling for a half-hour-or-so to find parking.

With gas at $4.59 a gallon, Robert didn't fancy springing a sawbuck on a trip to the Palm Sunday celebration in his sleek black SUV.

By the time he crested the top of Nob Hill, he was quite noticeably out-of-breath, though.

"Okay. Okay. Okay," he uttered up under his breath in his best Joe Pesci impression.

His work schedule had been hectic, and he had let the treadmill - and daily work-outs at the gym – fall by the wayside.

Steele was paying big-time for that act of laziness now, alright, as he struggled to regain his breath.

But, come Monday, he was going to hop to it, and get his cardio vascular pumping and in tip-top shape once again.

If it killed him!

The service at Grace Cathedral wasn't going to rev up for about ten minutes or so, so Robert took a detour through the well-manicured park across the street, where the locals walked their rambunctious dogs, elderly Asian men and women practiced Tai Chi at the crack of dawn, and singles on the prowl occasionally strolled with an eye towards a hook up.

He always marveled at the delightful fountain situated in the center of park - which glistened today - in the early-morning light.

If Huntington Park’s spiffy “waterworks” looked familiar, it was for obvious reasons.

The landmark is a replica of  an Italian fountain – “Fontana delle Tartarughe" – gracing the Piazza Mattei in Rome.

The original was designed in 1581 by Giacomo della Porta and featured bronze figures sculpted by a craftsman by the name of Taddeo Landini.

The beautiful centerpiece was originally known as the "Fountain of Dolphins" because it exalted slender bronze youths riding dolphins.

Gian Lorenzo Bernini added a humorous - magical touch - when he incorporated tortoises when the fountain was overhauled in 1658-59.

The four Croker children - prominent long-time residents on tony Nob Hill - donated the dazzling sculpture to the City of San Francisco in 1954.

Today, there was an exhibition of sculpture on display, which complemented the scenic grounds in the heart of the city.

Steele was particularly drawn to the work of Scott Roach and its obvious tribal art influences.

Unfortunately, a couple of the artists lacked the know-how - or literary skills - to properly promote their art in the hand-outs that were distributed to art-lovers who stopped by to chat.

On occasion, the mission statements were bang on, though.

James Moore, another talented sculpture, underscored his keen efforts to employ powerful visual vocabularies based on the cube to represent the human form.

"When the rules of proportion and balance are applied, the resulting works capture what I see as the essence of graceful and playful movement and gesture."

His stick figures - one titled "Leap of Faith" – tossed the spotlight on his light touch, sense of humor, and unique crafting and construction skills.

None of the pieces would shake up the art world, unfortunately.

An old expression sprang to mind.

"I don't know much about art, but I know what I like."

When some fool uttered up a comment like that - an artist friend of Robert's - would invariably laugh out loud.

"Yeah, just betcha, they're the kind of folks who love black velvet paintings."

"Leslie, stop. That's rude, they'll hear you," Robert would urge in a polite hushed voice.

It was embarrassing the way the robust happy-go-lucky painter scoffed at potential patrons.

"It's your role to educate and enlighten," Steele teased in a sly effort to smooth the waters.

Les was the kind of artist who would rather starve - than sell a painting to some moron with big bucks - who he felt didn't deserve a passionate creation drummed up from the very depths of his artful soul!

"Boy, you wouldn't have survived in the middle ages," Robert lightly scolded.

"To survive in that era, artists were required to flatter their wealthy patrons with appealing likenesses, or be forced to live in the poor house.”

Indeed, quite a few of those wealthy old dames were ugly as sin, but you'd never know it by their celebrated portraits hanging in world-class collections at top-notch museums and prestigious art galleries around the globe.

In retrospect, you had to wonder, how Picasso ever got away with depicting Gertrude Stein as the old shrew that she was, without being banished from her elite powerful inner circle.

Personally, Robert preferred landscapes - the Hudson School, for instance - and Canada's group of seven.

Steele pined for the day when his walls would be graced with a Lauren Harris or Emily Carr.

“I’ll have to start chasing ambulances and representing clients in the insurance-industry-racket to afford it,” he ruefully complained to his friends.

________________________________________________________


When Robert dashed into Grace Cathedral, a line was forming at one end, where the faithful waited patiently to follow the Choir down the aisle with reeds in hand during the Palm Sunday celebration.

One of the priests informed him that there were a few seats available in the pews, so he snatched up the program, and slipped into seat a-dozen-or-so rows from the front of the Cathedral.

Funny that!

There was always a good turn-out on Christmas (for midnight Mass, in particular) and Easter, the two holiest occasions on the church calendar, each year.

Did Christians feel guilty if they failed to observe the birth and death of Jesus?

Were those faithful moments expected to book-end their dreary little lives, and curry favor with the Lord?

Or, were they the meek simply bowing to peer pressure?

If Steele neglected to attend service regularly, it was because of a growing trend at the Church, he was not in accord with.

At Grace, there were quite a few females preaching, which made him a tad uncomfortable.

A phrase from the Bible loomed large in his mind in that regard.

"The Whore of Babylon."

If Robert recalled correctly from his Sunday school classes, the "Whore" was associated with the "Antichrist and the Beast" referred to in the Book of Revelations ( and the allegorical kingdom).

According to the prophecies in the final chapter of the Holy Scriptures, the apocalyptic downfall of the "Whore" unfolds in the hands of the beast with seven heads and ten horns.

Robert reached for a copy of the St. James bible on the bookshelf and perused the passages to refresh his failing memory.

The Holy Scriptures / Revelations

17:4

And the woman was arrayed in purple and scarlet color, and decked with gold and precious stones and pearls, having a golden cup in her hand full of abominations and filthiness of her fornication.

17:5

And upon her forehead was a name written:

Mystery, Babylon the Great, Mother of the Harlots
(Abominations of Earth)

17:6

And, I saw the woman drunken with the blood of the saints, and with the blood of the martyrs of Jesus.
And, when I saw her, I wondered with great admiration.

17:9

And, here is the mind which hath wisdom.
The seven heads are seven mountains on which the woman sitteth.

17:10

And there are seven kings:
Five are fallen, and one is, and the other is not yet come
And, when he cometh, he must continue a short space.

17:11

And, the beast that was, and is not,
Even he is the eighth, and is of the seven, and goeth into perdition

17:12

And, the ten horns which thou saw are ten kings, which have received no kingdom as yet;
But, receive power as kings one hour with the beast.

17:15

And, they saith unto me, The waters which thou sawest
Where the whore sitteth, are peoples, and multitudes
And nations, and tongues

17:18

And the woman which thou sawest is that great city
Which reigneth over the kings of the earth.

Biblical scholars commonly used the phrase "Whore of Babylon" to refer to the Roman Catholic Church.

Reformation writers who taught these associations included respected Martin Luther (1483–1546), John Calvin (1509–1564), and John Knox (1510–1572)

Supporters often quoted the following verses from Revelations 17:5 to describe her:

"And on her forehead a name was written"

"Mystery, Babylon of the Great, Mother of Harlots"
(Abominations of the Earth)

A harlot is representative of a church that has been unfaithful,

"The woman was arrayed in purple and scarlet, and adorned with gold and precious stones and pearls, having in her hand a golden cup full of abominations and the filthiness of her fornication."
Understandably, Steele felt more comfortable with a male presiding over the services, as a matter of personal preference.

Go figure!

Female doctors gave Steele the willies, too.

However, some dudes warm up to the idea of a physical - or prostate check - with a pretty young intern at the – um – helm.

Was Steele a male chauvinist pig?

No, it all went back to his childhood - the way he was raised, his faith, and that sort-of-thing.

Curiously, a few weeks prior, Steele attended a service at Grace - the “Contemplative Eucharis” - which was held early in the evening at 6 p.m. on a Sunday evening.

It was an intimate affair, where two dozen or so parishioners formed a circle on the labyrinth, near the entrance of the Cathedral.

Shortly after the breaking of the bread, and the drinking the blood of Christ, a still small voice inside of him spoke out.

"God is not here."

Say what?

He looked around.

Did anyone else hear that?

Nope, guess not, because they solemnly continued worshipping.

Weeks later, the memory of it, still caused him to shudder.

After the service, Steele dashed downstairs for a coffee and cookie on the house, and to unwind.

In spite of the fact it was Palm Sunday, and heartfelt sermons were uttered up upstairs just minutes prior, the volunteers serving up the refreshments remained aloof and distant from the parishioners streaming in to chat each other up.

When Steele approached one table with flyers on it, a prissy middle-aged lady stared down her nose at him, and blurted out rudely:

"This is for women."

Gosh - did it never occur to the ice Queen - that a handful of men in attendance might be interested in rustling up information for the women (mothers, sisters, girlfriends) in their lives?

"I'm not wearing my glasses, so I couldn’t peruse the information on the hand-out," he responded, with a broad smile, nonetheless.

Suddenly, he recalled that Grace had a new web site, so he pulled out his laptop to see if the webmaster had set-up any Internet connection yet.

When the splash screen burst across the computer screen, the usual list of Internet servers, were blocked out.

The walls at Grace must be pretty thick, Robert chuckled to himself, as he perused the screen for more options.

When he clicked on the icon for the lone service that popped up in a dialogue box, he noticed the ID right off-off-the-bat.

It read "Black Hawk".

A shiver ran up his spine, but it wasn't a pleasant one, in fact.

He pondered the situation for a moment.

What would happen if Steele inputted  "Whore of Babylon" and tried to use the three digit password  666?

(to be continued)

http://www.thetattler.biz



Fountain in Huntington Park on Nob Hill!


 

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Scandals of the Privileged Few! A novel by Julian Ayrs! Chapter 2!











According to the rumors, the owner of the grand old Victorian mansion with the intricate antique gingerbread trim, fell victim to hard times and was forced to unload the three-acre property at No. 8 Stone Canyon Trail for a song.

On the heels of the distressed sale, a posse of slow-poke contractors and well-heeled snooty decorators turned up on the secluded estate one fog-laden morning to work their magic.

The sudden flurry of activity out-of-the-blue raised an eyebrow or two when the loud dusty construction first started up - but – it wasn’t until a squat Mexican gardener puttering around in the garden revealed the extent and nature of the renovations underway that the shit really hit the fan.

Blueprints – lifted by a neighbor with connections at City Hall – revealed that the historical landmark was rezoned to make way for rental units on the site.

The mere thought of an apartment complex standing ramrod straight in their midst, was enough to trigger a knee-jerk reaction among the staid old guard, who sprang into the fray bent on halting the intrusion on Cypress Ridge about to transform the terrain before their very eyes.

“There goes the neighborhood,” one disgruntled resident muttered under his breath, one fine day when he was out walking the dog.

When the word leaked out that the lone buyer was a reclusive European Countess, the rumor-mill shifted into high gear, and the tongues began to wag.

The scuttlebutt ran the gamut.

"The mysterious dragon-lady is sole heir to a fabulous fortune," one gushed.

“Old money,” another asserted in a hushed reverential tone of voice.

"Money doesn't talk, it screams," another lamented.

"Obviously, the bitch is highly connected", one angry long-time resident sneered, when a petition to halt the project was mysteriously stalled in its tracks.

Speculation about the Countess's personal affairs behind closed doors reached a fever pitch.

Without an ounce of proof one scurrilous character took it upon himself to spread a nasty rumor.

The chi chi Countess was allegedly a lipstick lesbian who once-shared her exquisite four-poster bed - replete with hand-crafted Queen-size pillows and pricey designer sheets - with legendary screen Goddess Greta Garbo.

That juicy bit of gossip stuck - go figure - shortly after a lawyer representing the interests of the aggrieved parties confided to a couple of his partners that a stern letter to the Countess failed to engender any meaningful settlement talks.

“I want to be left alone. That was her one-line response,” he hissed to all within earshot, as he threw up his hands in the air in disgust.

A scant few months later three qualifying tenants settled into their tony suites, as a handful of disgruntled neighbors gazed on with their noses totally out-of-whack.

_____________________________________________________


Reginald Bartholomew scrutinized the documents once again carefully.

Sure that he crossed his “t’s” and dotted his “i’s” - he was inclined to flip off the gold cap on his elegant fountain pen - and affix his John Henry to the historical document he was about to sign into law with a flourish.

It was a remarkable accomplishment for preservationists.

Henceforth, influential developers intent on tearing down Historical landmarks within San Francisco proper, would find it virtually impossible to achieve their self-serving greedy ends in the future at the expense of the will of the people, the community-at-large, and the environment most of all.

“A toast is in order,” Bartholomew chuckled to himself, as he strode out the door to celebrate with his partners, who were grinning from ear-to-ear at the prestigious Royal Oak Club on Nob Hill.


____________________________________________________


Union Square was teaming with excited tourists as Brad strode across the plaza in the direction of the exotic archway splashed in red and gold that marked the entrance to festive Chinatown on Grant Street a-hop-and-a-skip-away.

First up?

A stop into a quaint little shop to pluck up a package of incense, an ornately-decorated box of loose Jasmine tea, and a chocolate-covered fortune cookie at the local bakery.

On the way out the door, he gave a nod to a photo of former President Bill Clinton, which graced the wall over a counter stocked with a dozen-or-so delicious bakerd treats.

A few strains of the old rock 'n roll hit - "I Ain't Superstitious" - rumbled around inside his head for a second or two as he proceeded to crack open the cookie.

Uh-huh!

Like it or not, no matter what the message surreptitiously tucked inside said, he'd take it to heart.

Therefore, here were rules to follow, for good reason.

For example, if he rustled up an upbeat message, Brad would carefully fold up the forecast and insert it neatly into his wallet next to his billfold for good luck.

In contrast, an ominous warning - hinting that he may encounter "interesting times ahead" - was summarily tossed into the trash.

In the latter case, the appropriate ritual ensured that any negative influences predicted, were sure to fizzle out.

Silly?

Uh-huh!

But, nonetheless, he never tempted fate.

"Step on the crack! Break your mother's back!"

He laughed to himself.

Thank Buddha for the healing power of meditation!

Admittedly, it was tough spiritual assignment, alright.

Being "empty" and existing in the "now" - free of the tendency to grapple with surreal notions about reality and illusion - was a tough row to hoe.

An old Chinese proverb sprang into mind!

Before enlightenment
Chopping Wood and Drawing Water
After enlightenment
Chopping Wood and Drawing Water

The incense, on the other hand, helped set the mood.

But, more importantly, the sweet-smelling stuff hid the pungent tell-tale aroma of marijuana from his landlord's super-sensitive snoz!

A big fat doobie relaxed him.

Nope, Brad wasn't hooked on the high, in spite of constant teasing from his buddies that (on the contrary) he was pot-head all the way.

The attitudes of society had changed considerably over the years, anyway!

In the 60's, a dude was liable to be sentenced to seven years behind bars for mere possession in Canada, for instance.

Today, cops strode by tourists toking up at trendy sidewalk cafes, and snickered at each other knowingly as they looked the other way amused.
An overzealous pig might write 'ya up a ticket, on the other hand, when least anticipated.

Heck, last night Craig Ferguson teased one of his guests about the pleasures (and merits) of dropping acid and munching on magic mushrooms!

"What kind of high do you experience," he quizzed the surprised actress, who played along nonetheless.

Surely, he was pulling her pretty leg?

Brad just might pay his doctor a little moolah under the table to rustle up a prescription to purchase medical marijuana so that he wouldn't run the risk of getting busted.

A couple of his former room-mates - who were suffering from complications of A.I.D.S. swore by it - in spite of spirited arguments from Government attorneys that the leafy green stuff had no medicinal benefits whatsoever.

Needless to say, when his spare time permitted, Brad often joined in with activists at the non-profit organization - Americans For Safe Access - when they marched in the streets in support of the cause and denounced the DEA para-military-style raids on pot dispensaries in West Hollywood and elsewhere in the Golden state in recent months.

Once, Brad actually posted a feature-length article on the issues, on an Internet web site which was highly-trafficked.

Alongside a publicity still of former Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger taking a toke on a joint at Gold's Gym at Venice Beach in his early body-building days, Brad scrawled the following cheeky caption:

"Don't Bogart that joint, Arnold!"

The hunky terminator must have a sense of humor - because he didn't react angrily - or demand that the incriminating publicity still be taken down from the "Tattler" blog site.

At this point, Brad's thoughts drifted to a life-long friend who recently passed to spirit in Canada.

Whenever he spied Tiffany pour a stiff shot of whiskey, a guilty look spread across her face.

Then, she'd let out her signature giggle, and utter up lame excuses.

"For medicinal purposes," she'd cackle.

"Pour me a jigger, please," he'd respond, quick on the uptake.

Misery loves company, after all!

Then, just like clockwork, the winsome twosome would drift off into a stupor as the sound of the waves caressing Sunset Beach just outside the bay window, ushered 'em both into a deep soothing sleep.

Gosh, how he missed her!

(to be continued)

http://www.thetattler.biz



 
 
 
 
DEA Raids in Los Angeles!
 

Saturday, April 16, 2011

ALL TIME LOW...Pop Band appears @ Warfield! San Francisco! April 16th!








 




Although a posse of music-lovers escaped town this weekend to - party-hearty, catch a few rays (God Willing), and revel in the eclectic sounds of a handful of high-profile popular bands slated to take the stage at Coachella Music & Arts Festival - a gang of die-hard "All time Low" fans trotted down to the Warfield to snatch up tickets for a live! concert tonight at the legendary venue.

Tourists were forced to maneuver their way through a gang of band enthusiastics camped out on Market Street in a line that snaked haphazardly down the street as far as the eye could see.

"All Time Low" is a band that hails from Baltimore which consists of vocalist/rhythm guitarist Alexander Gaskarth, lead guitiarist/back-up vocalist Jack Barakat, bassist Zachary Merrick, and drummer Rian Dawson.

In high school, the ambitious pop talents started out humbly enough, covering for pop punk bands such as ever-popular Blink-183.

In a short meteoric rise, "All Time Low" suddenly found themselves signing a record deal with enterprising "Emerald Moon Records".

"The Party Scene", their 1st studio album, was released in 2005.

A deal with "Hopeless Records" triggered a debut album which featured two catchy tunes for their EP which was titled "Put Up or Shut Up."

The EP landed on Top Heatseekers charts as a result.

"So Wrong, It's Right" was their most commercially successful recording which peaked at number 62 on the Billboard 200 (and number 6 on the Independent Albums chart.)

"Dear Maria, Count Me In" - a nifty tune about a stripper from their hometown - took off and was singled out at number 86 on the Pop 100 (to later achieve gold status in spite of the fact they did not nab any radio play).

The hotties were first featured on MTV - then followed up that appearance with a high-profile debut on the Jimmy Kimmel show broadcast out of Hollywood.

Understandably, there has been no looking back!

CONCERT

April 16th

VENUE

Warfield
982 Market Street
San Francisco, CA
94102-4012


CURTAIN

7:00 P.M.

TICKETS

http://www.thewarfieldtheatre.com/events.php

http://www.thetattler.biz





Stylish hip band popular!

San Francisco...panhandling troubling to tourists! Union Square top attraction!






 






Obviously, tourists holidaying in the picturesque city by the Bay are leaving a piece of their hearts behind when they jet home after a brief stint catching the local sights.

According to a recent poll, a whopping 98.3 % of the visitors surveyed were enthusiastic about repeat vacations to tony San Francisco down-the-road.

Not surprisingly, the top tourist attractions in the bustling European-style metropolis turned out to be Union Square (65.2 percent), Fisherman's Wharf (56 percent), Chinatown (38.4 percent), the Embarcadero Center and Ferry Building (37.9 percent), and last - but not least - North Beach (31.7 percent).

Obviously, savvy world travellers are not that keen on patronizing the local strip joints, or retracing the footsteps of cult heroes like Jack Kerouac and Allen Ginsberg who once frequented character-driven haunts in the North Beach neighborhood.

Unfortunately, a couple of troubling problems running rampant in the streets have sent up red flags.

Top annoyances?

Aggressive panhandling and noticeable homelessness in garbage-strewn streets - were not only a turn-off to the jaded few - but triggered worries over unwanted advances and potential threats to their overall well-being and safety while hunkered down in the West Coast enclave.

Recently, the city passed a tough ordinance in a deliberate effort to curb loitering in high-traffic tourist areas, but the jury is not in yet on how effective the measures have been in alleviating those glaring social dilemmas.

According to one columnist in a local daily, until San Franciscans find long-term solutions to the problems, the West Coast destination may not realize its full economic potential.

News at 11!

http://www.thetattler.biz





Cable Cars still a big draw!
(even while being overhauled)